I think I was born with baby fever. I can’t ever remember a time I haven’t wanted to be a mother.
To care for something that was a part of me, to experience childbirth and embrace the blessing of a life born from so great a love. I feel it to be ingrained in my person, and a desire that is knit directly to my soul.
Words can’t describe the longing, but words can describe the waiting.
At this moment, I need more than 2 hands to count the number of pregnancies and newborns that I am aware of, so many little lives growing and being born!
Today is my very first niece’s due date! The little girl who will make me an aunt for the first time will be coming into the world any day now!! I am so thrilled and I am so proud of my sister, Charissa, who has carried and kept her little girl so well for the past 9 months!
For now, an aunt is what I am meant to be. Not yet a mother, but happily an aunt!
For now, Justin and I stay a family of two.
And I am learning to wait, in the best of ways.
I always want to stay away from the thought that though we are only a family of two right now, as I hope for a future time to be a family of more, that it doesn’t mean we are missing pieces from our lives right now. Our family is not lacking because we are not adding, our family, yet still small, is strong.
We are strong as two
and we will only become stronger in the future as babies come and children grow.
I am proud to have our family of two, so thankful to be blessed with Justin,
to grow up together, to adventure together, to take chances together, to make mistakes together, to grow in Christ together,
and I am always praying for the patience and the peace of mind to never miss out on what we have right now, even as the future holds such beautiful possibilities.
Our family is one of my greatest treasures,
and our future family one of my greatest hopes.
And I know that right now Justin and I are experiencing life fully,
just the two of us.
I think perhaps if Justin and I were able to have pets I could appease my hope for babies for a time, sadly though that solution is one that is unavailable to us due to our housing situation.
Although, when we are able to get a pet, it will be a Samoyed puppy and it’s name will be Noodles and it will be amazing!!!